


Hallå

by Missy



Category: Addams Family - All Media Types, Adult Wednesday Addams (Web Series)
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Humor, Lovecraftian Monster(s), Making Friends, Monsters as Pets, Trick or Treat: Treat, retail work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:20:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27051070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missy/pseuds/Missy
Summary: Wednesday Addams has faced many a fearsome thing in her relatively short time on earth.Working as a greeter at IKEA may be the scariest yet.
Comments: 18
Kudos: 44
Collections: Trick or Treat Exchange 2020





	Hallå

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Miss_M](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_M/gifts).



> This isn't QUITE Wednesday battling Lovecraftian horrors, but if I figured that if anyone in the world would have personal contact with Cthulhu the Addamses would!

“ _Hallå_ ,” Wednesday said in a flat but polite monotone, adjusting her nauseatingly bright blue smock. “Welcome to Ikea. My name is Wednesday, and I’m the dark queen and overlord of this establishment.”

“Uh, yeah,” said a dark-haired woman in a mesh skirt and black tights, her black-polished lips surrounding a candied apple, “can you show me to the bargain basement? My chair fell apart and I have a tarot reading tomorrow.”

Wednesday’s eyebrow rose. “You practice the dark arts,” she said. “Have you ever contacted the flayed souls of the damned?”

The woman raised her eyebrow. “Only my Uncle Myron. Have you?”

“The flayed souls of the damned stopped speaking to my family when my brother tried to use them as background extras in his play about Benedict Arnold.” Wednesday snorted. “They’re awfully sensitive if you don’t go through their agents.

“Wow. That’s so LA,” said the girl. “I knew this guy who was into cornflakes and he…” Whatever Wednesday's new guest wanted to say about that was cut off by a soft roaring noise, and the slow, creeping appearance of a long green tentacle with a suction cup bottom creeping along the garishly bright polished floor.

“Don’t give in to your fear. This is my favorite pet. I call him Igly,” said Wednesday, petting a slimy tentacle. “He helps me run inventory on Thursdays.” The tall brunette’s candied apple fell from her mouth and she stared at the creature looming over Wednesday’s shoulder. 

“You really are in contact with Cthulu?” 

“He’d rather I call him Uncle Cthy,” said Wednesday. “But we only communicate when I want to bring the fires of hell down upon the world’s evils. Such as those who park in fire lanes. Or men who catcall.” 

The other woman took Wednesday’s chilled hand in hers. “My name’s Wendy.”

“Hello, Wendy. I believe I have many things to show you,” Wednesday said, and together they walked – or in Igly’s case - crawled toward the back room for a chat.


End file.
